Was looking for stg

Was looking for something and thinking bout peh..stumble upon a few interested facts that no one knows..Recalling my silly behavior but its worth it. Since she's my gf now.

Stress

I am actually indeed quite stress out with my college work..there are loads/tons /bundles of paper that I have to write this semester..damn man.. Me, always procrastinating, will usually wait until the very end before I even start on it..Which is a very bad habit of me.. and i found that , as we grow older, our brain starts to deteriorate. why i say so...i need more time to digest the things compared to last time...  On top of my tons of paper, i still have to study for the CFA...kinda regret to enroll in it. well, i am 90% sure that I am going to flung this test, but somehow, something just keep motivating me to study it.. I neglect all my college studies just for the CFA.. well, with recession and all stupid stuff going around in the economy, I bet i have to at least pass tis paper in order to secure a job for myself.. ><.... Feel I am getting old, and I am so uncertain of my future..what would lies ahead in another year's time.. 

Taking love for granted

THE other day, my mum called to tell me that she and my fa-ther were considering buying two placements in a memorial park as their final resting place ''when the time comes''.

I know very well that there will come a time when we will leave this world, but it is not something I often think about.

It is okay to plan for birthdays, weddings and retirement, but planning for death is not the norm. Not because it is not logical or practical, but to think of death is to bring on fear.

My boyfriend asked me a few days ago if I fear death.

“No, but I fear pain. But what I fear most of all, are the deaths of my loved ones.”

Just the mere thought of not seeing my parents and brother again cripples me with fear. When my parents speak of where they would like their final resting place to be, I am afraid to listen and refuse to take it seriously.

My grandfather was taken ill recently, and when I paid him a visit I was reminded that even the strongest and healthiest of us will not stay that way forever.

My father is 53 this year. He goes to the gym a few times a week, takes care of his diet and is far from old. He is able to fix almost anything in the house and he still takes cares of me like he always does.

All these years, I have looked upon my father as someone who is infallible, strong and able to find a solution to any problems that I may have.

It scares me to think of the day when he will not be as he is now, when time and age catches up. I would rather not see the lines around his eyes, or how tired he looks at times. I don’t want to notice him limping a little sometimes because his feet hurt.

My father is not a superhero, but sometimes it is easy to forget that because of how well he takes care of the family and me. Too often, I take his love and his health for granted.

When someone loves you unconditionally, it is easy to be careless with that love, because you assume that it will always be there.

You forget to say thank you, or be polite, or even do something nice in return.

During a meeting with the managing director of a company who is interested in working with me on an endorsement project, he said something to me that no one has ever said before.

“No offence Xandria, I think your work is great but the reason you are here is because of your mum.”

“Your mum is such a good person. I think what you are today is because of your upbringing. So you have to thank your mum and dad,” he told me with a smile.

I couldn’t be happier or more proud hearing this. I have always wished that people could see that. My mum is my manager, and I have had people being nicer to me than they are to her.

Some have even been downright insensitive and rude to her, but sugary sweet to me.

I have never understood that. Being a manager of a company is not an easy task, and if the company runs smoothly, it is very much due to good management.

My career has been on a steady climb because my mum is an amazing businesswoman and manager. I have manners, respect, compassion and faith because my parents have taught me that.

I have written in a previous article that if someone should praise me, they should praise my parents 10 times over.

Many have asked me during interviews if I feel that my mum is overprotective as my manager, and my answer is that I am much more protective of her.

Even then, I cannot be a hypocrite. I cannot expect people to be nice and kind to my mum when there are many times when I have also hurt her with my impatience and attitude.

The worst part of it is that the hurt she experiences because of me is much more painful than those inflicted by others.

And the irony is that it is often easier to be nicer to acquaintances and friends, than it is to be mindful of the feelings of our loved ones.

Mother’s Day has just passed and Father’s Day is around the corner. Being able to celebrate these occasions is just a reminder of how fortunate we are to have known unconditional love.

Death is inevitable and maybe if we stop and think about death once in a while, we would appreciate life better.

THANk you

I am so sleepy~~.. but I just feel motivated to write something on my post. I am not so much of a tech ky person and I am really not patient to wait for the website to load.. haha.. So I usually will try to do minimal stuff on my laptop. ..I am not motivated already now..when I am writing..i have alot to write..but just too lazy...ZZZ

Good times, Good Memories

I read some of my friends blog, Kit Meng, though i still preferred to spell it that way, no offence, and he was saying that times cant really be turned back....It makes me think back bout the times when I was in Sunway College, and Taylors, all good and bad memories will be with me forever and I really want to thank everyone who makes my life meaningful. I will really treasure the time I am with my friends because I know, when we reach certain point in time, we will walk different paths in our lifes. And I really hate that to happen. but that's just how it is going to be.

Better in Time

Time will heal everything. Many people believe things will get better in time. But in reality , does it really happen in the way that favors you. Just now, I chat with my 'long dint talk friend' ...Dont know why ..we chatted for about 1 and a half hours. non stop..makes me feel happy bout it.. Undoubtedly, i think i really miss her. Sometimes , you just dont realize you miss someone. If you just lay back, relax, and give a deep thought, I am sure you definetely have someone to miss... Haha, If I am going back this summer, I'll definetely find her. For sure. Then we'll have a good chat.

Test

没有请的八月。。。em qing...

I have a number of tests this week.. Have been thinking of hitting the book since I came back frm playing basketball...but still...its been about more than an hour, and I am still lazing around...Just dont feel like have the motivation to study like last time.. Aii..So hate it when there is so much things to do...and so hate it when there is nothing to do... No matter how much, we human are given, we'll never satisfy and grumble, I guess.. Contemplating on learning piano this week... Well, I do this not because I want to show off after I learn or use it to court girls, but because I am interested in playing instruments since small but there just ain't any chance for me..That's all for tonight..